How to Control Lust? 12 Ways to Control Lustful Thoughts
Sexual desire is a normal part of any healthy relationship. It not only fulfills physical needs but also promotes emotional bonding and connection. In such a healthy relationship, sexual and lustful thoughts are satiated after a point. But what happens if you don’t stop at this point of satiation? What happens if you make a habit of indulging your lustful impulses? What happens if you don’t learn how to stop lusting? Lustful thoughts, if uncontrolled, lead to lustful actions. These actions may not be the best way to meet your emotional and physical needs in the long term. Lustful thoughts can also compel you to indulge in sexual misadventures – putting your health and happiness at risk. Most importantly, if you don’t know how to avoid lust, your mind will be easily distracted, and instead of doing activities you truly like, you will end up wasting precious time and energy. Introduction Human beings are often the sum of their thoughts and desires. Because, subconsciously our thoughts and desires dictate our actions. Nothing we do is random – even our most impulsive actions have their seed in an emotion that we feel strongly. Lust, in particular, is a very powerful emotion that can influence our thoughts and actions. So, if you do not know how to control lust, it can compel you towards sinful actions. If you can not learn how to stop lusting, it can affect your relationships and overall well-being. Lust or sexual desire is a key human trait. It is not an emotion you should be scared of. But you must learn how to control lustful thoughts and make them a healthy part of your committed relationships. What is Lusting? Lust begins with an awareness of sexual attraction to another person’s body. If you choose to fixate on this awareness, it triggers lustful thoughts that create a craving for a sexual connection or sexual gratification with that person. Lustful thoughts are an overwhelming feeling of craving that dominates your thoughts and emotions. Lustful thoughts are not only triggered by the physical presence of a person. Sometimes, just words or explicit images are enough to create sexual desires and urges. Cause of Lustful Thoughts Lustful thoughts are triggered by exposure to a visual image or wording that creates a craving for sexual gratification. Science has found that lustful thoughts are tied to your brain’s reward system. Hormones such as testosterone (which influences your libido) and dopamine (pleasure and motivation) are associated with lustful thoughts. These hormones create a strong urge and sexual excitement that will cloud your judgment. The cause of lustful thoughts is not only internal but also external. Research agrees that most human behaviours are initiated automatically and unconsciously in response to environmental cues. Your environment is not just the physical world you live in but also the mental and psychological space that surrounds you. Even words can act as cues for lustful thoughts. How to Control Lust? 12 Ways to Control Lustful Thoughts Lustful thoughts are a behavior pattern. If you don’t address them early, your mind can form a habit of lustful thoughts. So, here are 12 ways to control lustful thoughts – Identify your triggers – We are often impulsive in behaviour and fail to identify the thoughts or emotions behind the behaviour. That’s why we feel like we do not have any control over our lustful thoughts. So, you must identify the specific things that trigger lustful thoughts in you. Your triggers could be words, images, or even emotions like stress. When you identify your lust trigger, it gives you the power to control your reaction to it. Stop judging – It is natural to feel guilty about having lustful thoughts. But guilt and shame are negative emotions that do not propel you towards positive action. These emotions are more likely to make you feel helpless and alone. Instead, have a little insight into your weakness for lust. Meditation and Mindfulness – Meditation and mindfulness habits help you distance yourself from your lustful thoughts. When you are more in touch with your feelings, you can consciously pull your focus away from them. Most importantly, meditation will help you calm your agitated mind and give clarity when lustful thoughts are assaulting you. Find healthy distractions – Resisting lustful thoughts is emotionally draining. It can make you feel like you are always playing a defensive game. To feel more empowered, find healthy distractions to engage your mind. Exercising or spending time with friends is a good idea. You can also find a safe hobby that will take your thoughts away from lust. Establish boundaries – You can define your boundaries online and offline to create a safe space. These boundaries will help you avoid exposure to lustful thoughts or images. Don’t feel guilty or feel the FOMO for not doing what everyone else is doing. It is ok to prioritize your health over fitting in. Get physically active – Our sedentary lifestyles are a major culprit behind our hormonal fluctuations. So, get moving – even if it is just going for a walk or a game of tennis with your buddies. Physical activity boosts hormones such as dopamine and serotonin. These happy hormones help you avoid lustful thoughts by eliminating feelings of stress and boredom. Take up a spiritual practice – Spiritual practices such as prayer and reading scripture will help you find guidance to get rid of lustful thoughts. All spiritual practices stress self-awareness and self-discipline. Both of these qualities are crucial in emotional regulation and shifting your focus away from lustful thoughts. Make sleep a priority – The quality of your sleep determines how well you can focus during the day. Research has found direct links between sleep deprivation to poor self control and focus. Poor sleep depletes your ability to resist temptations. A good night’s sleep helps you take charge of your thoughts and guide them in constructive ways. Develop a healthy sleep habit (7+ hours, avoiding screens at bedtime, early