Porn addiction is an extremely complex issue with no simple answers or cookie-cutter solutions. But most people I talk with fall into what I call the “Zap Trap”—praying that God would just heal them or looking for some other instant solution. They want to stop watching porn without having to fight the fight for recovery.
In fact, brain science reveals why breaking free from unwanted porn habits can feel nearly impossible. However, understanding the neuroscience behind porn addiction offers hope for recovery.
This article will help you understand the answer to “Why can’t I hate porn?” and how to stop watching porn.
What is Porn Addiction?
Although porn addiction has yet to be recognized as a diagnosable condition, this behavior has been described as “problematic pornographic use.”
If you’re addicted to porn, you can be so overtaken by the need to consume porn that you may begin to watch it in public spaces like at work or on public transit.
Statistics on porn addiction vary by source, but one study estimated that porn addiction affects approximately 3 to 6% of adults. It is viewed more by young adults, with men viewing it more frequently than women. Use tends to decline with age.
Why Can’t you Hate Porn? 4 Reasons Why you can’t Hate
Recent brain studies reveal fascinating insights into why you can’t stop watching porn. Specifically, researchers have found that regular porn consumption actually changes your brain’s structure and function.
When scientists compared the brains of frequent porn users to non-users, they discovered several key differences:
- Less gray matter in the reward center that controls motivation and decision-making
- Reduced connection between the prefrontal cortex and reward system
- Weakened activity in the region responsible for willpower
- Decreased response to regular sexual images
#1 Dopamine
This is an image containing multiple scans of the human brain.
The body’s response to pornography is driven by the most complicated organ in the human body, the brain. God made our bodies with a good and beautiful design. One created facet of our bodies is that when a person experiences something enjoyable, something that the brain wants to remember and repeat, it releases dopamine.
#2 Manipulation
Sex provides the highest natural dopamine hit. However, there are non-natural ways that hijack and exploit the brain’s dopamine reward system. The 3 man-made stimulants that produce more dopamine than sex are:
- Meth
- Cocaine
- Porn
Hours-long porn binges can produce 10X more dopamine in the brain than relational sex. Dopamine ensures that the brain remembers and later craves the activities that led to the high amounts released. This explains why it’s so hard to quit porn for many people.
#3 Warped Brain
With these manipulations, the brain’s reward system warps, and it now craves not just the good and enjoyable but also the destructive. What was God’s good design in your body has now been corrupted and your brain-wiring and dopamine-release pursuit will leave you feeling helpless to stop the very things that you desire to cease and know you need to end.
#4 Neural Pathways
Although you may not often think of brain science when jumping on your bike, humankind knows the sort of muscle memory that comes from riding a bike over and over. Typical bike riders follow a script: the beginner child displays very focused, intentional efforts on their first few rides, while an experienced, adult rider will jump on their bike and be on their way, without any intentional thought toward their actions.
Also read: How Long to Rewire Your Brain from Porn Addiction?
How Hard Is It to Quit Porn?
At its core, pornography addiction can be described as the compulsive engagement with pornographic material, despite negative consequences. It’s a behavioral addiction that shares similarities with substance dependence, including the development of tolerance, withdrawal symptoms, and the disruption of daily life. People with a pornographic addiction often find themselves in a relentless cycle of craving and regret, which perpetuates the addictive behavior.
From its prevalence to the way it affects our brain chemistry to the way it keeps us from seeking help, porn uniquely combines factors that make it highly addictive. Think of a porn addiction in the same category as a cocaine addiction–if you had a limitless supply you could access in seconds. That’s one of the reasons why is porn so hard to quit, and why people say I can’t stop watching porn even when they want to.
How to Stop Watching Porn? 5 Practical Ways
If you think you might be dealing with a porn addiction, below are some tips to help you to stop.
Evaluate your Values
Think about what’s motivating you to change or why you want to stop looking at porn. Maybe you’re trying to improve how you’re seen by others, or your porn consumption is taking too much time away from achieving your personal or professional goals.
If you’re religious, you might see using porn as going against the teachings of your faith.
When you feel stuck or like giving up, remember what inspired you to stop looking at porn in the first place.
Eliminate Porn
This includes any physical or digital evidence of pornography content in your life. You need to make a clean sweep of all of that kind of content. There’s no excuse to hold on to any of it, even those vintage porn magazines that might have some sentimental value.
Once the content is readily available around you, it’s easy to slip back to old habits. On your phone, television, and other devices, you should install filters that block pornographic content and sites.
Have someone you trust create the passwords that keep pornographic content on your devices blocked using a porn blocker like BlockP.
If you’re thinking, “I cant stop watching porn,” removing access is the first real step.
Join a Support Group
A support group helps you remember that you are not alone. It also eases your recovery journey if watching porn isn’t just a habit that you want to quit but has risen to the level an addiction.
These groups provide a safe, anonymous, and judgment-free zone for you to share your struggles with pornography and hear from other people who are going through similar experiences.
Also Read: 5 Best Porn Addiction Support Groups for Recovery
Engage in Confidence-Boosting Activities
Fill your time with activities like exercising several days a week or playing recreational sports, starting a new hobby, cultivating new friendships, or any other healthy activity you enjoy. Decide ahead of time which activity to engage in when you feel the urge to use porn so you have an action plan.
Spend More Time With Your Partner
Take a break from sex for a few weeks or months to focus on your porn habits and engage with others emotionally. When you feel ready to interact sexually, focus on the 7 dimensions of healthy sexuality.
- Sensuousness: Stimulate all of your senses and indulge in behaviors and environments that make you notice colors, sounds, feelings, tastes, and smells.
- General relationship intimacy: Simply enjoy hanging out with others without being sexual.
- Partner intimacy: Spend time with your significant other (if you have one) without any sexual activity.
- Non-genital physical touch: Make you and your partner feel good without sexual stimulation, like snuggling, hand holding, kissing, or back rubs.
- Genital sexuality: Enrich and sustain sexual contact and emotional intimacy during sex (for example, holding eye contact while making love).
- Spiritual intimacy: Start thinking of sex as an expression of your feelings and your connection to your partner.
These practices address both emotional and physical bonds and help you get to the root of why do I keep watching porn, instead of just treating the symptoms.
How does BlockP help stop Porn Addiction?
Protect yourself and your family by blocking adult content with the BlockP Porn Blocker. It helps people manage internet activity by blocking adult content, helping those with porn addiction, and minimizing distractions for better mental health.
Some of the features of BlockP are:
- Custom Blocking: Offers customizable filtering, allowing users to block the exact websites, keywords, and content they don’t want to see.
- AI Blocking: Using Artificial intelligence, our extension goes through the entire web page, detects adult content, and blocks it if present.
- Block images and Videos: Hides explicit images and videos on web pages so that you do not get distracted.
- Allow in Incognito Mode: BlockP functions even in incognito mode so that users cannot disable the porn blocker even during their private browsing sessions.
- Password Protection: Entrust a family member or friend to set a password to change your settings. It is easier to overcome addiction when you have someone by your side.
- Focus Mode: Set a timer that prevents access to custom websites for a while to stay focused without any distractions.